Recruiting

One of the things that I feel a little guilty about, is recruiting new players, but it's also damn fun, and keeps the hobby interesting. If you play this game, odds are, either you got someone into this game, or someone got you into it, there is just no way around it, it's a two person game.

Now you could argue that I am doing a good thing, bringing something this awesome into someone's life, but to be honest, I wish I had never heard of warhammer, because I am far more than addicted, its just so damn awesome.

Now recruiting new players means a few things, first it means, getting them to choose an army. Next getting them to buy the army. Then, getting them to assemble and paint the army. But wait, there's more, it means getting them to learn the rules. That is a lot of stuff, and certainly not for the faint of heart.

Getting them to choose the army, while difficult, is the easiest step, pretty much because it's free, and requires no commitment. If you're like me, then you spend countless hours simply finding ways to categorize armies, like comparing each army to a metallica song, or nation in world war two, or even shapes. I know that makes no sense, but I get bored easily. I personally find the person will automatically have a connection with the army, and choose pretty quickly on their own.

Next comes the big hurdle. The deal breaker. The heartbreaking point of no return. Breaking it to them how much this is gunna cost. I have spent more money then I dare look at, on this game. If you can get someone to buy an army, then you've got them.

Next comes the tender love and care they must put into their army. This is a process that will give them the personal touch, and the reason to fight. Sadly, this is the least paid attention to part. Please, care about your army, and give them a narrative.

Lastly, getting them to learn the rules, this is the fun part, but also a headache inducing part. For me, the rules are second nature, I simply don't even have to think about them anymore, but God forbid, I have to explain why it is the way it is. There is no way around it, you are going to have some long matches, that are filled with lots of re-reading rules. My first three matches were all over 7 hours long, and that was with only 1000 points, go figure.



Now all these steps, and procedures mean nothing if you can't hook the person to begin with. For me the easiest way to do this, is to show them your army. Just have a friend come over, to watch the big game, easy because the super bowl is coming up. While they are there, you will just happen to walk by your army on a grand display. Pretending to be embarrassed you attempt to hide your ode to nerd-dom. Seeing this as some dirt to get under you they pry further, however, they are inherently jealous, as they are impressed by your awesome collection. Then, after giving your story of how great the 41st millennium is, you can ask them if they want to play. They almost always say yes, so long as you smell nice. Then while you are playing, bend the rules. Bend the rules, a whole stinkin' lot. Trust me, they have no idea why they are rolling the dice, and they never remember the rules the first time around, they aren't invested that much in it yet. When they have the match of a lifetime, thanks to your impromptu rule changing, they will have had so much fun, that you can then begin spinning your web.

Of course that makes us sound evil, but who doesn't love being the bad guy every now and then?

Bit of a Rant on Armies

One of the harder things for me as a community player, is to recruit new players, and get them to play the army I want them to. Now, that probably came out as making me sound like a control freak, I'm not (at least I don't think I am lol). What I mean is, I don't want them playing the army I am going to collect next. I really want to collect space wolves, I love vikings, and I really wish space wolves were worse (really I'm not a band wagon hopper, as much as GW is trying to make me). Well, this guy wants to collect space wolves as well. I mean this guy is one of the guys who simply collects an army because it's the best. He trys to make his army as dirty as possible, in my opinion this is like raping the game. It's not right, you should collect an army because it fits your playstyle, or because you like it, not because it's the best. Anywho, my plan, is to try and push him towards tyrannids, they are new, and pretty powerful, and make a great opponent. Especially because 6 out of 7 players play for the imperium. I always end up being renegade guardsmen for the campaigns, oh well. Anywho, bit of a rant, but hopefully you enjoyed it.

Incoming Transmission

Vox casters, are simply no good. There, I said it. It's not that they are too many points, nor that I find them useless, simply that it requires two vox casters to make one work, so that's a man from the officer's cadre that doesn't get a special weapon. My officers are designed to stick it out with the lads, and get kills, a voxcaster only marginally helps, compared to taking out a tank or heavy infantry unit the Guardsmen can't do on their own. Orders are important, but shouldn't form the basis of your plan anyway. Orders are about squeezing the most out of a unit, and their impact is only seen after a few orders. One FRFSRF will rarely be the deciding factor in wiping out a unit.

Guerrilla, Gorilla, Biiiiiig Difference

Guerrilla warfare has always represented a challenge to any force, from the American Revolution to present day operations, guerrilla warfare has been a staple throughout modern history. In order to incorporate a few of these elements from guerrilla warfare, I will be giving you some house rules, and hopefully inspire you to create your own. So let's dive right in.

These may only be given to experienced units (like IG veterans, or SM sternguard):
outflank - 10 points
pinning - 3 points per model
infiltrate (but only into jungle or forest terrain) - 10 points
hit and run - 15 points
scouts (but no outflank, you have to pay extra for that) - 10 points
acute senses - 1 point per model
see through jungle (I don't remember what this rule is called, but its the one that allows you to see more than six inches through forests and stuff) - 10 points

These may be given to any troop choice infantry unit:
Move through cover - 10 points
defensive grenades - 15 points


And remember, this is by no means a strict list, feel free to make things more or less points, just make sure you both agree on it. Lastly, lets talk scenarios.

Imagine, your Guard platoon are on a patrol, and then tyranids (they seem to be the buzz the days) jump out at you! Same rules apply from the ambush scenario from the big book. Luckily for this scenario your Guardsmen hail from a deathworld, and may pick from the above traits (except outflank and infiltrate). Just keep it jungle themed, or forest themed, and you should have a great time, I know I do.

A Guided Tour Through an Imperial Guard Rifle Platoon

Some of you may notice the Tom Clancy book reference there, if not, check out his book "Marine" it's a fantastic read for military buffs, or proud Americans. Now I am going to take you through the backbone of my Imperial Guard army, the infantry platoon.

For starters, we have the Lieutenant and his bunch, consisting of five lads, we have the Lieutenant himself, who only carries a chainsword and bolt pistol into battle. Next we have his adjutant, a young chap, who has earned the right to carry the platoon standard, which has my trademark, Aquila-planet-anchor (note another Marine reference) symbol as well as a platoon designation. Then we have two Grenadiers and a flamer or a meltagun, depending on how many points I have left. There we have our platoon command squad, perfect for hanging tough with the guys, and there to lead a charge or smash a light tank. The focus of this unit is to stay with the rest of the squads, and make sure they get the job done, no matter the cost, mission first, then troop welfare, then your own welfare, that's how we do it in the 325th.

Next in line are the poor dogfaced soldiers themselves, military men have never been pretty, but by God, we are dependable. Consisting of ten men, a Sergeant armed with a boltpistol, chainsword, and meltabombs, 8 men with lasguns, bayonets, and a whole lotta guts, and lastly a lone man with a grenade launcher. Now, you may be wondering, where in the galaxy are the heavy weapons? Well, they wouldn't be mobile infantry if they were afraid to move up, now would they? Guard are some of the fastest footsloggers in the game, with Move, Move, Move! they easily get the most out of their running. That all being the case, I take advantage of that, and don't bog my lads down with heavy weapons. It's easy to meld the two units together, but they are more effective separate, and prevents that static gunline that looks so good on paper, but in practice, not so great. I usually take three squads of Guardsmen, that gives me a large amount of men, but not necessarily overkill.

Special weapons squads are an often avoided choice by guard players. Most opt for a unit of veterans instead, favoring their higher ballistic skill. Well, when it comes to flamethrowers, ballistic skill doesn't mean shit. For more on my special weapons, search for my combat engineers, they are the subject of another article.

Lastly we have the heavy weapons teams, these are wonderful given the right circumstance, used improperly, and you've wasted your points, and more importantly, your money. Now, I prefer to take different heavy weapons per platoon, but there is one mainstay through out all of my platoons, and that's the autocannon, I field six of them for every platoon, that's two units of three for you numbnuts out there. The autocannon is my absolute workhorse, when I point them at you, you die, plain and simple, and with range 48, I can point them very far indeed. Now for one of my platoons I take a team of mortars, this provides the barrage, and pinning power my lads need to make sure they wipe the table with the softer units. For the rest of my platoons, it's lascannons I bring, they give my men the firepower to crack the toughest nuts.

Best of all, a platoon built in this way is almost exactly 500 points (508 to be exact), so it's easy to build lists. Now how do I use my platoons? Well, in the beginning of the game, I give each platoon a reasonable objective, such as securing a table quarter, or parking in the middle of the board making it difficult for the enemy to move around. Occasionally platoons will need support from other platoons, like in the event of an officer dying, or needing a few extra lascannon shots. Generally, I don't combine squads, unless it's annihilation, or I will be doing a lot of running, in which case one order gives you more bang for your buck when it covers thirty men, instead of ten. I don't combine my squads because I like the autonomy of a squad, if it needs more men, then they are there, if it doesn't, then they can go their separate ways. Multiple squads are also better on defense, where one can go to ground and survive that extra turn of shooting, or one can make a sacrificial charge to cover the retreat.

In the end, I like platoons because I like the men, and never forget the tired, aching, bloody infantry.

Riders of the Rivermark

One unit that I never see, and believe me, I mean never, is rough riders. Why? I read up on them, and they are fantastic, simply throw a unit of them (only 55 points mind you) into a 5 man tac squad of Space Marines, and watch the carnage, statistically they should win the overall combat. Now the key to all this, is the hunting lance, which give you strength five, and initiative five, and counts as a power weapon, suck on that Space Marines. Now, it does have a flaw, in that, it only works one time, but by the end of that combat, they should be half dead anyway, but hey, 55 points taking out close to a hundred points, not bad, not bad at all. Now, one of the things that you rarely see, is the cavalry special rule, in that they can charge, 12 inches. That means that from 18 inches away they can deliver 11 strength five power weapon hits.

What's the downside to these badasses, well, after their first charge, they aren't much, and the fact they are WS3. Other than that, you can't ask for much more out of 55 points. But all that aside, why do we see none of them? the answer, is GW's fault. $12 a model, and it's not even cool looking? WTF! The need a plastic kit, and to make these guys look cool, ditch the damn Mongol hats already! Either do that, or I'm converting some Rohirim, to fight alongside my IG. Imagine that, Rohirim with lasguns and flamers, sounds purty cool to me.

The Punisher VS. Demolisher

After my last article, Wartorn Streets, I took a long look at the Punisher Gatling tank. It's a pretty expensive unit compared to other tanks, weighing in at 180 points, it's only outclassed by the Executioner, which is 190. However, it makes up for it's cost in efficiency, because unlike the other tanks, this one doesn't need many upgrades to become MVU (most valuable unit). I recommend taking the flamer. This tank is designed to specifically kill infantry, nothing else. Also heavy armor, and a dozer blade are necessary, because they allow you to keep moving forward, a must with it's lousy 24' range.

Now let's get to the star of the show, the gatling cannon itself. With a whomping 20 shots per turn, all of which are cranked out at strength 5, there is no doubt in my mind that whatever infantry unit is being fired upon, something will die.

However, with only 24 inch range, and no antitank (unless firing at the rear, in which case, you have surprisingly good odds of at least damaging the tank), this tank finds it's home mainly in the wartorn streets of Cities of Death. Now, it's not alone as a top-notch Cities of Death tank, the Demolisher is also a star. The question now is, which to take? The Demolisher is fantastic at what Guardsmen are not, it's got great survivability, massive strength, and it's just damn cool, well, maybe Guardsmen fall into that last category, but you know what I mean.

So if your army sucks at anti-tank, armor piercing, or survivability, take the Demolisher. If your army sucks at anti-infantry, massed firepower, or close-combat, then take the Punisher, obvious really. Only you know what your army needs, because your army, is an extension of you, and that's what makes Warhammer beautiful.

Wartorn Streets

After playing a few Cities of Death games, I truly do appreciate the role infantry play in close combat support. People always say it's advantageous to keep a squad of infantry or two near vehicles, so let's take a deeper look into this.

First and foremost, against things like lascannons or other pesky ranged anti-tank, Guardsmen that surround the vehicle provide it with a 50% coversave, this does not mean that they take the shots, simply, they distract the shooter. Secondly, and perhaps more importantly in the confines of Cities of Death, they can screen the vehicle against assaults, you can't charge through a unit to get through to another. As Guardsmen however, when used in this manner, you forfeit their lives, so use this at your own discretion. Thirdly, when used to support one another there is nothing they can't tackle.

Some Guard scenarios often encountered in Cities of Death:

Space Marines: SM's benefit very little from Cityfighting, they have better armor than the cover provides, and their armor goes with them. Guardsmen however, benefit greatly from Cityfighting, using a plethora of cover, and orders to make sure you squeeze every last percent of probability out of them. That said, here's the best way to tackle a squad of Space Marines. Wait for them to come to you, trust me, they will, they think of Guardsmen as squishy, and easily beatable, a perception I love to fuel. Now when they do, make sure you are positioned about 20 inches away, that way, you can have line of sight (LOS), fire on them, and they have to either run to be in rapid fire range, or stay put, where they are at the mercy of your barrage weapons, and platoons of Guardsmen. Tanks are especially handy here, particularly the demolisher, who's short range (only 24') is no problem. Tanks are particularly great against Space Marines, as it denies them their armorsave, and most likely, gives instant death, and with a screening unit of Guardsmen, it should be an especially tough nut to crack.

Tau: Mobile Tau provide an especially daunting experience for Guard players in Cities of Death. They can fly over the buildings and hit your brave Guardsmen from any angle. However, there is a method of easily defeating them. First, when they disembark, hit them with multiple pinning weapons, mortars and sniper rifles are my preferred method, and you need at least two, that insures they will be pinned. Once pinned, charge them, they're only Tau after all, and with a flamer or two (a necessity in Cities of Death) you should wipe them out no problem.

Tanks: Guard have an advantage in both the tank, and screening unit categories here. Their tanks are usually better, and their screening units are cheap and there are plenty to go around. Just make sure you have screening units, and you're Leman Russ's should come out ok. Speaking of the Russ, it's important to know what loadout to take. For starters, the sponsons, just ditch 'em, they will be of little help in the narrow allies, if you want more anti-infantry, the stubber is a better option. Instead of a lascannon or a bolter, a flamer should really help, at the very least, it can clear opposing infantry from buildings. Heavy armor isn't all that necessary here, you should really be parking it anyway, or screening it with units. Dozerblade you can take depending on how much rubble you have.

Tank Hunting: In Cities of Death there is no shortage of vertical terrain, take advantage of this when tank hunting, because the top of a tank has the same value as the rear (yet another advantage for the Demolisher, who has rear 11). Now this works best for me with deepstriking units. Usually an opponent will lock down a street or intersection, so simply drop down with some stormtroopers, with a melta or two, and hit them from above. Killing the tank will immeasurable aid the Guardsmen about to overtake the intersection. All that said, pay attention to the loadouts of your opponent's deepstriking units, so that doesn't happen to you.

Orks: Few armies give my Guardsmen more trouble than Orks. A single Ork Boy, on the charge, could easily expect to kill two or even three Guardsmen. So the trick here, is to bring fewer Guardsmen, and a few more tanks. Now I'm usually no fan of "treadhead" armies, but for Orks I make an exception, especially in Cities of Death. A few Punishers will wreak havoc against those pesky hordes of Orks, especially if the Guardsmen nearby take the brunt of the assaulting powerclaws. Particularly troubling to me, is that intact buildings provide little help against Orks, saving you only from one round of combat, because the nob in the unit will simply blow it up with his powerclaw. So really, just stay as far away as possible, and get those Punishers out there.

Last Stand

Because I play a horde army, I have a vast collection of models, and this allows me to do things others can't. I often use my collection as a whole for campaigns, things like waiting on reinforcements and such. However more and more, I find myself enjoying custom zombie games. Here are the rules I follow for my zombies, feel free to take or drop what you like.

Zombie: 3pts per model, must come in hordes of 15-30
WS:3 BS:0 S:3 T:4 W:1 I:1 A:1 Ld:10 Sv:- (6+ invulnerable)

Special Rules: Feel no Pain, Fearless, Rage, Vulnerable to Templates
Shambling: must roll D3 and that is how many inches you may move in the movement phase, (you may also run D3, but may assault 6, this is because zombies gain a sense of urgency when attacking to their prey).
Conversion: when a zombie wounds an enemy infantry model, on a 4+ the enemy model is replaced by a zombie under the control of the zombie player (including models with multiple wounds).
Horrifying: any unit that suffers a wound from zombies must take a morale check.
Endless horde: at any point in the zombie players turn he may select a unit of zombies and remove them from play. On that players following turn, that unit arrives at full strength, just like it was at the beginning of the game. It counts as arriving from reserves.
Undead Mob: all models in the unit must be in base to base contact with as many models in the same unit as possible. (this is not necessarily the death penalty for breaking this rule, but simply try and keep them as jampacked as possible, they are zombies after all)


I like to play this with night fighting rules, and the defenders may choose a building or ruin to have a searchlight. I also prefer to play smaller point games, and in very small areas, so the zombies dreadfully slow movement isn't too much of a hindrance. Small points keep it balanced, and more epic looking, since it would be a platoon of Guardsman against over 100 zombies.

The more buildings you have for this the better, because it adds to the zombie theme, and it really helps the zombies out, by blocking line of sight and preventing the rage special rule.

Lastly, keep in mind, this isn't a perfect points value for everyone, because this requires an extensive amount of models, however, I find it the most fun. Here is a higher points zombie, that I don't really use, I am just throwing it out there for people who want a smaller game, but to keep the zombie theme.

New Age Zombie (infected): each model is worth 16 points and must come in units of 15-30
WS:4 BS:0 S:4 T:4 W:1 I:5 A:1 Ld:10 Sv:-

Special Rules: Fleet, Counter-Attack, Fearless, Furious Charge, Night Vision/Acute Senses, Rage, Vulnerable to Blasts/Templates, Endless Horde (see above) Horrifying (see above) Undead Mob (see above)

You'll notice the humour in calling it infected, or a new age zombie, because more and more zombies are no longer what boards where to the Karate flicks of old. It used to be zombies where totally different, I prefer the classic myself, slow shambling easy to kill. Now they are stronger when they are dead? Does that make sense to anyone? I know, they are infected... this is all an argument for another day.

Now the "infected" are a lot stronger than the zombies before, hell, these ones have fleet. These zombies will almost always win on small maps, I like that because I think it adds to the narrative. Now, you'll also take note, that these zombies no longer have the Conversion special rule I gave the old ones, that's because they are already beyond great. Now clocking in at 16 points, and with no armor save, you can expect to lose an awful lot of them.

Deployment is also key, make sure that the defender is holed up in a city block in the center of the table, then the zombie player may enter from whichever table edge he chooses.

Final words of warning, this is in no way supposed to be a competitive match, just damn(ed) good fun.

Making an Army to Fit the Points

When I first started to play warhammer 40k I lost every game I played, for months. My group loved to play against me, because they knew they would win. You see, none of us were hardcore about the hobby, there was Drew, who used to be, he is the one that really thought us, but you could tell his heart wasn't in it anymore. Anthony was my most common opponent, he played Tau, and at the time I played Tyrannids. I had to borrow Drew's army, and he played nidzilla, I wanted to play swarm, so I tried to make my 15 hormagaunts and 9 genestealers a swarm army for 1500 point game. There was my problem, it's really obvious looking back, but at the time I had never seen what a proper swarm army was. Granted, no one had a large army out of that group. Everyone played with under 40 models, and they built their armies similar to how I did, they stretched them out to make them more points.

Fastforward to present day, they don't play with me anymore, because I got more hardcore about it than they did, and I can tell you the last time I visited them (keep in mind, this was with old codex too) I didn't lose a match. We spent all day playing, and I never lost.

Moral of the story is, don't stretch out your army to make it more points. Now I am assuming most players don't do this, but if you do, think about it. Are you giving your troops upgrades they don't need? Are you taking a vehicle upgrade simply because you have the points? Now this is good to an extent, like maybe 10 points or so just to hit that 1500 mark, but they were trying to play 1500 point games with 800 or so point armies. Now, I understand, it's a lot of money to collect a 1500 point army, but who said it had to be 1500 points? If you have an 800 point army, play 800 points! It will be more enjoyable, I promise.